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It’s unique to each of us, what makes us happy. While it may seem simple to figure out, many people are so inundated with the daily demands of life that they have lost a connection to themselves – and when asked what makes them happy, they can’t quite answer. For instance, I recently asked a friend what she does to nurture herself. With a perplexed expression she looked at me and said, “I am a mom. I don’t have time to take care of myself.”

In addition to being a mother, this same person is a highly successful business owner whose marketing agency has happened to have won numerous, prestigious awards within the marketing and PR industries. Her firm has also been a partner firm to my business, Refresh Agency, for more than 10 years. She rocks it in so many ways – but when confronted with the question of how she does so by taking good care of herself, she’s at a loss.

This is not atypical. In fact, the vast majority of us live this way. Unfortunately, though, this type of mindset is exactly what will prevent you from maintaining the level of happiness, fulfillment and aliveness in your life that you so desire. We need to first and foremost take care of ourselves by doing things that build up our reserves and allow us to become closely intimate with ourselves. Only then, when we are overflowing with the abundance we give ourselves, can we truly show up in the world and make a difference – whether it be in our families, businesses, friendships or, in a larger perspective, the world.

So allow me to ask you this simple question: What makes you happy?

If we have bought into the modern, western way of thinking and believing about what should bring us happiness, we are driven by an outside force and not from our core selves. This will not make us happy in the long run – it will deplete us..

So allow yourself to dig deeper – what makes you happy?

Once this first step is clear to us, we can begin to take ownership of bringing happiness into our lives. It is an active, not a passive, decision. I love how this quote from the Dalai Lama sums this up:

‘Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.’ – Dalai Lama.

When we are able to see happiness this way, we can step into a place of personal power. And when we take full responsibility for our own happiness, we get to create the business and life we really want.


4 Steps to Creating Happiness in Your Life:

  1. What works for you right now? Do more of this.
  2. What doesn’t work for you right now? Stop doing this.
  3. What would bring you the happiness and fulfillment you seek? (Reflect on the feeling(s) you want to feel). Write it down. Look at this list daily.
  4. What concrete action will you take to bring you the feeling of happiness you are looking for? You need to do something different than you do now – and it needs to be a concrete action. PS. A new positive thought doesn’t count as a new action, we are not working with a diffuse spiritual principle here. If you keep doing what you have always done, you will get what you have now. Bringing a deeper level of happiness into your life, requires real action on your part.

Lastly, I want to make sure that you know that you deserve to feel alive, fulfilled and happy. If I can assist you, please feel free to reach out.

 

Happy creating!

follow that dream(cropped)

 

How do you plan on taking flight in 2015?

‘And the day came when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom’ ~ Anais Nin

As a culture, we love to set New Year’s intentions at the marking of a new year. I think this is a wonderful tradition.

Every moment is an opportunity for us to set new intentions and new standards for ourselves. Giving us the opportunity to create the lives we want to live.

But for a moment, let’s play along with the New Year’s intention…

 

Take inventory of 2014

Taking a quick inventory of the year past can work wonders and bring awareness to both what we do not want more of in our lives, and therefore can leave behind in 2014, as well as what we do want more of.

What do you want to leave behind in 2014?

Take out pen and paper, and make a list. This can be specific projects, or tasks in a project, which drain you, rather than uplift you. It can be people, who you are feeling drained by, or who brings conflict rather than creation and good energy. It can be less than self-caring eating habits. A needed change or fine-tuning of exercise routines, or trying a new and more self-nurturing way to stay fit. Psychological ways of being that is no longer serving you. States of mind that self-sabotage. Decisions you make, which do not bring you happiness.

 

2015 Intention

Make a list of what you want more of in 2015. What worked for you in 2014? This can be the kind of people, who really make a difference in your life – what are the concrete personality traits that make these people so desirable to you? (Ex. visionary, kind, creative, open-minded, supportive, stable, reliable, positive and so forth). Which activities make you feel expanded and automatically drawn to? Which projects do you really like working on, and what are the concrete tasks and responsibilities you thrive on? What wasn’t present at all for you in 2014 that you really want in your life this year?

Once you have created your two lists. Close your eyes. Take a few deep breaths and then visualize that with your exhale you release all the items you want to leave behind. Let them disintegrate. Make the choice to not let these things take any more of your thoughts and time. It can truly be this simple.

Then, read over your list of 2015 Intentions again. The key to your successful 2015 is to place all your focus, energy and time on all the great, desirable, passionate, kind and loving things you want to bring more into life in 2015. Schedule these priorities into your day. Place high importance on these items, so you can create them in your life. It will only happen if you take new action.

Under each point on your 2015 intentions list, write the concrete action you will take to give yourself the life you want in 2015!

 

Happy creating.